This week, I had the pleasure of coaching some amazing women around career advancement and transitions as part of the 2024 National Conference for Women. Though every woman's circumstance was unique, a common theme ran across many of those conversations: we need to say no more often.
The Best Kept Health Secret
The most significant contributor to my health and well-being was learning to say no. Not the "maybe, let's see" kind of no that means "convince me." I mean the full-stop, end-of-discussion, don't-even-try-it no.
Saying no meant reclaiming my time, energy, and sanity. It meant understanding that my worth isn’t measured by how much I can take on but by the quality and passion I bring to the things I choose to embrace. It also meant having the time to feel grateful for my journey and where life was taking me next.
I said no to overworking to meet impossible standards. No to sacrificing my mental health for the sake of appeasing others. No to the voice inside my head that said I wasn’t enough unless I was stretched way too thin at every turn.
By saying no, I said yes to opportunities that mattered. Yes to self-care, setting healthy boundaries, and creating a life that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.
The kindest thing you can do for yourself is to permit yourself to say no. Saying no powerfully declares that you are in control of your life, your choices, and your happiness. No leaves room for you to say yes to the things that matter and to the unlived life you've been waiting to lead.
So, go ahead. Say no. It might just be the most liberating thing you do. And who knows? It could lead you to the career, life, friendships, and relationships of your dreams.
In Power and Solidarity,
Toya